I crawled out of my tent feeling slightly hungover. Then I faced the latest abuse as I stood up. Oh, for fuck sakes! What a mess. Empty beer bottles were scattered all around. They had been consumed and abandoned without love. I let the grim scene sink in as I yawned and farted. Well, we’ve pulled it off. Nothing gained or achieved yet again. They say that wisdom comes with the ages, but that’s clearly not coming anytime soon. Simply drinking some beers without stupidities. Nah, even that was too much to ask for. Politically incorrect jokes will be cracked before you know it. You’ll see moronic dances and chairs getting airborne. Anyway. New day, new chances. My two partners-in-crime arose from their coma. New bottles were popped not much later. Good. A good start is half the work, so let’s get down to business. Yeah, let’s do this!
I treated everyone on a healthy dose of Forest Gump. The boom-boom-boom created an oasis of tranquility. We didn’t see or hear anyone anymore. Even the begging seagulls were gone without a trace. Alright, that’s enough of the ultimate remix. We left our post out of decency for the neighbors. But the electronic music went with us. Let’s blast that portable speaker and go bananas. We pretended all was normal as we walked through the campsite. No chance. Loud laughter betrayed our not-so-sober state. After this warm-up, the beach became my Waterloo. They were smart enough to cool off. I, on the other hand, dug myself in like a keen Kraut. Once in my hole, I was helplessly flailing and squirming. I didn’t understand anything anymore. All I could do was eating dust and praying out loud for salvation, by whomever or whatever. It worked. Moments later, a water bearer handed over two bottles of water. Water, the basis of all (Earthly) life. Wonderfully simple. Water bearers are so underrated. Brothers… Go and spread the goodness!
My mates ran into the ocean with open arms. The Gods of the oceans showed no mercy. I watched as they were swept and washed away. They constantly went under without resistance. No fight or struggle, just going with the flow. Look at them enjoying themselves. Their enthusiasm let this landlubber made a high exception. A little salt or wetness is fine. So, I threw myself into the waves with Dutch courage. Mother Nature swallowed me whole like a flame-grilled Whopper. She was talking to me underneath. ‘Go back to the origin. This is where it started, please come home’. It gave me the chills. Sod off. Persuade someone else to get some membranes, gills and scales. There’s already plenty of rotten fish floating around; let me be a stray cat. After this thorough washy-washy, I walked out the surf in shivers. Then we searched among the rocks for aliens. Everything was so soft. Fluent connections, picturesque patterns, pure observations: this was the intensely colorful oneness with the elements. All sense of time faded. We lost ourselves in the wonders of reality. The highlight of our exciting treasure hunt was a sandcastle. Look! So precisely constructed. So much care and time put into it. The pride it gives. Meaning. A purpose or something to live for… And then change pounded the rickety gates. Slowly but surely, the waves destroyed this masterpiece. All the sacrifices and hard work will soon be in vain. Goddamn! We couldn’t let that happen. Scream, shout, make wild gestures… Do something!
My “real” jobs, Mean Machines and precious savings! My broken relationships, second-class citizenship and free stuff! My fleeting me – everything slipped through my fingers. I raised my arms up in despair. My fragile little world is falling apart! Oh no! Nooooooo!!!
The rounds of an ever-twisting world smashed us. The crushing gravity nailed us to the ground. We watched some dancing gods in the sky as silent witnesses. It looked like a volcanic eruption, a vast bushfire and stray Northern Lights all in one. Or was this ‘just’ an ordinary sunset after all? Either way, we absolutely lost our breath. We stood there with lumps in our throats, wiping off the tears. God almighty. This goes way beyond art. We dropped on our bare knees and thanked our dear Lord. Through His service, we saw everything differently and felt all-inclusive. The mysterious connectivity of Bushyism brought us into ecstasy. We feel safe and comfortable with Him. He is our savior in need. He always remains with us; He is our hope in dire times.
We roamed along the coast. It was all as clear as day under the full moon. We looked up with a smile. Just look at Him. It’s the oracle that shot us far beyond Mars. We made it without solid-rocket boosters, somewhere in the great nowhere of the Milky Way. The stardust rushed through my veins. I could smell, taste and feel it. Then I heard voices again. ‘Explore this piece of the cosmos with dedication. Strip the ego and go all the way. Hike those beaches, climb those dunes, dive into the bushes. Experience paradise. Get lost and have fun.’ Nice. So much nicer than staying sober and building sandcastles. Soon, we’ll be good citizens again. Just for a little trip to the so-called real life. Not for too long, though, oh hell no. A wildlife safari has to be short and intense. But first, let’s get some proper sleep from this late night. So. More beers tomorrow? Should be alright, eh. Can do.
Drinking beer rules okay but experiencing the world more wholly is clearly a no-go; discourage and criminalize that shit.